This is me: Dika Mem

THIS IS ME: Dika Mem

Never stop believing in yourself.

That is what guided me from the suburbs of Paris to Barcelona and, even though I don’t look at what I’ve achieved very often, my family sometimes tells me to.

Last time I did was just a couple of weeks back, when I came back to the CDFAS (Central Department for Sporting Excellence). In short, the CDFAS is where I really started playing serious handball, where people made me understand that I had potential.

But before that, I never really thought about handball.

I actually started it when I was 13. Where I come from, it was all about basketball and football. Handball was a very minor thing.

I did not have any idols or players I was looking up to, in any sport, but around the buildings where I grew up with my grandmother, people were talking about nothing else.

Of course, being from the Paris area, I was a Paris Saint-Germain fan, but that’s it. And then, some friend of mine went to handball training, and I joined him, just because I had nothing to do.

The coach asked me to play with them, I tried and, to be frank, I hated it. So I thought that was a one-off thing, but then the coach called me back and asked me to give it another try. I did, I quickly realised that I was, let’s say, not too bad at it, and I never left.

Now, when I look back on my life, of course I remember that, but I also remember my childhood.

It was, let’s say…different from normal. Of course, you can always find worse than you, especially where I come from.

I was raised by my grandmother, Marcelline, and then by my parents. My grandmother has a huge influence on me, and she’s probably one of the strongest persons I’ve ever met.

For me and my little brother, who she also raised, there was always food on the table, but it came at some expense. I saw her working multiple jobs at a time just to make sure we would not miss anything. She made a lot of sacrifices so we would get what we needed.

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Of course my parents were there, but my grandmother did all the hard work. She paid for my handball licences when I started, she made sure I would go to training and I guess nothing would have happened the same way without her.

She’s the one I call after the games, who cries and tells me that she is proud of me. And, in a way, I am proud that she is proud.

Where I come from, they always say, “Step on the train while it’s there, because you don’t know when it’s going to come back.” That means that you might get one chance at having a good life, and that you should never waste it or you might never get a second one.

So when the handball doors opened in front of me, I went straight ahead and never thought back.

And I never stop believing in myself.

I don’t know where that comes from, but it’s always been with me. I remember seeing Nassabia, my mother, going to run with bin bags on her so that she could make progress, and never giving up.

I remember my dad, Olivier, coming back home all sweaty after his training.

I remember my grandmother never wasting an effort during her whole life, never giving up. She taught me to respect, to listen and to work hard.

I was born in a family of tough people, of people who always believed in themselves, and I saw no option of being different.

Handball began to be very serious when I was about 16 or 17. I was still at the CDFAS, which is a structure where all the best young handball players in the region are gathered and train heavily.

Clubs were starting to call me, trying to get me to sign for them. I was playing for the U17 France team, and that was quite a big deal. But I was not fussed about it.

I chose Tremblay-en-France, because that was close to home and I could still go and see my family at the weekend.

But then, things began to speed up. After just a couple of months, clubs were still calling, but different ones. My then coach, David Christmann, tried to convince me I should sign for a bigger French club or even go to the Bundesliga, but that Barça might be a step too big for me.

My brothers, Lens and Jordi, were the ones I turned to. Both were professional basketball players in the past and had been through all this transfer business before. They basically said the same thing as I thought: believe in yourself and give it a go.

And I gave it a go.

Of course, it was not easy to leave my family behind, to travel to a foreign country not speaking a word of Spanish nor English.

But I believed in myself. I was on a mission.

When I signed the contract, Kiril Lazarov and Marko Kopljar were the right backs for Barça. I knew things would be hard, that I might have to wait a little bit, but I also thought one day, sooner or later, I would get my chance.

A Spanish player that I met on the Hand Caribbean Tour set up by Didier Dinart, once told me that I should not give up on my studies and that I should be patient, because I would probably not play much in the first two years.

But I proved him wrong. The summer I arrived in Barça, Marko Kopljar was waived by the club, and the door was right there, open for me. Now people always ask me whether I felt pressure.

Well sorry, but no. Not having too much of a handball culture back then, the Palau Blaugrana was not the iconic arena to me as it was to some others.

And yes, I was surrounded by legends of the sport, but I was there to prove that I was worth the confidence the club had put in me. So I believed in myself, and I just went for it.

Xavi Pascual was one of the biggest people in my handball life. Pascal Pierson had been key for me when I was at CDFAS, but Pasci was so important to me in Barcelona.

He would make sure I had everything I needed, that I would not do stupid things and that I would focus on handball.

He was a little bit like a dad, even though I don’t like this word. Cédric Sorhaindo was also very important.

He took care of me, showing me from A to Z what it was to be a Barça player, how to behave both off and on the court.

Meeting “Tchouf”, as I call him, made me evolve very quickly, going from being a talented kid to a man. We still talk these days, very often actually, and I know how important he was to me.

It sometimes feels like I have taken up his role in Barça now.

Young players don’t show me reverence, let’s be honest, but they know their handball and I can feel their respect when they first talk to me. I might be 26, but I’m in my eighth season with the club and surely it means something.

They probably saw me winning the first two EHF Champions Leagues of my career. I say “first two” because I hope there will be many others in my career.

The first one I won was in 2021. I had been watching the EHF FINAL4 a lot on TV and on YouTube. I don’t know about all the legendary players from the ‘90s, but I still watched the legendary FINAL4s finals on the internet.

I was even in the stands in 2016 for the crazy Kielce comeback against Veszprém.

And when I lifted the trophy, in 2021, it felt like, finally, I was there.

Now, winning the Champions League is not the be-all and end-all in a handball player's career, at least not in my opinion.

But somehow, it felt like a milestone. Of course, I had won the 2017 World Championship with France, but I sat on the bench for the most part.

The Champions League was different, I felt like I had played a major role in the team that season.

And that made me proud.

I know how hard it can be to win the Champions League once, some amazing players have never won it once in their entire career, but I was lucky to do it twice.

Actually, I say lucky, but it has nothing to do with luck, in truth.

I worked my f****** a*** off to be where I am now.

And I still do, because I want to write the history of handball.

Having a player like Nikola Karabatic by my side in the national team is, of course, a big motivation. The man has won everything, and he is still going at it like crazy in training.

And he is still as happy as a kid when he wins titles.

Now, I am writing my own story, and I don't compare myself to Niko or anyone else. But I wish I could write handball history as he still does. That’s what gets me going in the morning, and that’s what motivates me every day.

And I know I can still have more trophies. Because I’ve believed in myself from day one to now, and this is not going to stop anytime soon.

Dika Mem 
February 2024